Okay guys… so I have to be honest and admit that the past couple of weeks have been really hard. I haven’t been feeling quite like myself. I’ve been doubting my abilities and spending a lot of time questioning what my true purpose is. Each morning I’ve been dreading going to work, questioning why I’m even in school again, and day dreaming every chance I can get. I want everything to happen and happen now. The reality is that instead of focusing on the positive in my life, I’m centering in on the negative. What can I say, I’m a work in progress! So, after spending some time trying to dissect the reason behind my negativity, I think it’s time I face my personal issues with patience.
I mean really patience…why?? Why must you test me constantly? I don’t know about you, but learning the value of patience has to be one of the most frustrating experiences. Personally, I like to blame the fact that I’m a Millennial and I don’t know what patience is. I’ve grown up in a world of immediacy, a world where everything I want or need can be obtained within the touch of my fingertips, so patience isn’t really something I’ve had to practice regularly. Essentially, when adulthood hit, it hit me more like a Mack truck rather than naturally and effortlessly. But as a woman who struggles with feelings of anxiety and fear of the future, I think my lack of patience comes from the place of needing to experience certainty. I find myself spending a majority of my time daydreaming about what my life will look like once I “get where I’m supposed to be”. I want all the answers but have difficulty practicing patience through the in-between. So I’ve started to use two of what I would call “mantra’s” to help me apply patience and find appreciation within the journey:
1.) Be patient with yourself
- It’s the all time cliché quote that arises when I think of this, “Rome wasn’t built in a day”. It’s okay to still be the search to find yourself, reach your goals, and discover what you want out of life. It’s also okay to have absolutely no clue about any of those things. Life is a very fluid experience, I like to think of it as a very grey area in a world where everyone wants you to be strictly black and white. We’re taught to think of our futures starting at 6 years old and we stress over the importance of “having a plan” throughout the rest of our school days. This is an opportunity to remind you and especially myself, let yourself LIVE. You don’t always have to have a scheduled timeline or plan to your life. Allow yourself the time to configure who your best self is, and what will bring you joy and peace in life. Allow yourself time to navigate this without shame or guilt in how long the process may take. Think about it: if we were all supposed to have our “shit together” (whatever that means, right?) at the exact same time, we’d all just be a bunch of robots. Be yourself, do things that serve who you are in the moment, enable growth, and work hard to achieve or experience the live you desire. Be patient with yourself along the way.
2.) Be patient with the world
- Sometimes things are out of our control. Life doesn’t always naturally ebb and flow the way you expect or hope it will, which in return leads us to believe we’re not enough. I know for me, I tend to place a lot of blame on life struggles such as student loans, working a job that is dissatisfying, or the mundane tasks required to be an overall healthy human, for a majority of my frustration. These things provoke me to ask the existential questions like “why am I even here?” “What’s the point of doing all this?”, “Why couldn’t I have chosen a less stressful path?”. And it has me thinking…those questions are very important but can also be SO unproductive to the unsettled mind. I can’t help but wonder if applying patience when asking those tough questions, as well as, while managing the inevitable adulthood stressors, may be best practice. Don’t necessarily blame the world for not being a positive outlet for success, but rather acknowledge it, and be patient with the time it takes in-between to get there.
Though I believe it’s extremely important to work hard in the interim of determining what you want out of life, I really think this message speaks to the idea of enjoying and appreciating the process of getting to that point. Essentially, instead of imposing negativity upon your daily life and waiting for “good things” to happen, work hard for what you want and practice patience as a way of positively navigating the journey to success. I hope that through practicing appreciation and patience, you’ll be able to experience less confusion, anxiety, negativity, doubt, shame, and all other harmful emotions associated with the pressure to have life all figured out. Because the fact is…you get one shot at life. Embrace the present moment. Don’t wait till your life is “perfect” and you’re where you’re “supposed to be” professionally/personally/emotionally/etc. to start living. Life is happening NOW…celebrate and enjoy it no matter where you are along the way.
Wishing you all a beautiful week and thanks for reading loves!!!